Thank You

I have the most unbelievably awesome family ever. I've written before about my husband and my father, but I also have an incredible mother and brother which I haven't had a chance to write about yet. In short, my mom is one of those women who prove you CAN have it all: she's a hard-working and devoted wife, a supportive and thoughtful mother, a greatly-loving sister and daughter, and a powerful corporate executive. She's beautiful, intelligent, and a great role model. She does all this and more and still manages to look like she's in her early 30's--people usually think we're sisters! My brother, too, is the best anyone could ask for. He's handsome and hilarious and wildly talented at eclectic things from guitar to math. He's one of my favorite people in the world to spend time with--one of my best friends. Basically, like I said, I have the most amazing family anyone could dream of. These people, my mom, dad, brother, and husband, are my family and my four best friends. And, they've put up with a lot having a daughter/sister/wife that's so wrapped up in medicine--and I'm not even talking about the financial burden (yet)!

This post is dedicated to family members of pre-medical students. I would like to say, "thank you" for what you do for us on a regular basis. I know that we (I) sometimes act strangely and I'd like to explain some of our (my) odd and seemingly off-the-wall-behavior.

When we come home from school and don't want to talk about it, it's not that anything devastating happened that day. It's also not that we don't want you to know what's going on in our academic lives. It's just that school completely occupies our minds day-in and day-out and, sometimes, we just want a couple of minutes in which we don't have to speak of/think about/acknowledge the existence of our universities.

When we are outraged over a B or (God forbid) a C on an exam, and we get aggravated because you tell us about how most people would love to just pass, we're not trying to be hateful. We simply know this. However, this thought is not comforting to us because we've made it as far as we have by not behaving like others; by not settling for just passing. So, we're not really wanting you to feel sorry for us at these points. Usually, we're just angry at ourselves for not doing as well as we know we could have and we just need to let it all out for a moment around someone with whom we feel safe.

Please, when we come home speaking of things like rhodopsin, dehydrogenase mechanisms, and molecular recombination, please humor us. Sometimes we forget that everyone is not a science enthusiast (AKA science nerd). We don't mean to bore you and we're definitely not trying to sound superior; we just learn things that sometimes excite us (because we are, in fact, proud science nerds) and, since we love you so much, we want to share those things with you.

When it seems like all we talk about are the entrance statistics of medical school matriculation, the drop rate for organic chemistry, our percentile on the MCAT, or the difficulty level of our physics courses, we're not trying to brag, I promise (well, most of us aren't...). We're really just terrified of these facts and we want to share them with you so that you know what we're up against. That way, in the end, if we make it, you'll be that much more proud of us. And, if we don't make it, you'll be that much more understanding of the effort it took to even try.

When we lock ourselves in a room, excuse ourselves from the party early, leave your homes after just getting there, or do any other act that is generally understood to be anti-social, it is NOT that we don't want to be with you. No, no. Please don't think that. We really do simply have that much pressure on us to get back to work. So, please understand that we love you and we'd really rather be with you, but at those moments, we absolutely must work. It's not our first choice, it's our obligation.

What this all boils down to is this: the families and friends of pre-med students deserve special thanks. Speaking to those families and friends: we pre-meds know that you all put up with some strange and sometimes alienating behavior. We also know it's not easy to love someone that's always preoccupied, busy, and tired. If I may speak on behalf of most of the pre-meds that I know, I would all like to thank you for supporting us.

To my family: thank you for always believing in me, making me feel like I could do this, and giving me the confidence to get up everyday and face the odds that I have faced. I know that without you, I'd be nothing like I am today. Thank you for supporting me and I can't wait until the day that I am able to repay you!